I saw that she had made up her mind, so I stopped forcing others to be difficult. Although I didn't like being rejected in my bones, I still pretended to be indifferent and said beautifully: "I wish you happiness." In fact, at that time, although I I can't be happy, but I don't feel sad, at least, I didn't shed a tear for it. To be honest, sometimes I really doubt that I am a cold-blooded animal, otherwise, why do I feel so rejected by others? Generally speaking, when the average person is rejected, even if they don't cry, they will feel sad about it. Or, have I become numb to emotional matters? One thing I'm sure of, though, is that if she did accept me, I'd be overwhelmed. how to say? I remember she asked me a word, she said: "Have you ever thought about marrying me?" At that time, I didn't know how to answer her, but later I also imagined that if I really married her one day, then What kind of thing will it be? I can't imagine what it's like to be married to her. Let's just call her, I feel like I don't know how to call her. call her name? Or call her wife? Or call her Xiaofeng? I find the three titles weird and difficult to pronounce. I was wondering if it would be a little strange if I called her by my first name; if I called my wife, it would seem a bit disgusting; if I called him Xiaofeng, wouldn¡¯t it be too nasty? Anyway, no matter which way of calling it, I always feel a little uncomfortable. In fact, I still don¡¯t know how to face this person in the end, because I am not prepared at all, but I still feel reluctant. In other words, this is the selfish side of people. in contradiction. Sometimes I think again, it¡¯s fine to call these things, and I¡¯ll get used to it gradually in the future. But what to do after marriage? Stay in Bridge Town and continue working? Or go back to Beishi? If I stay here, I always feel weird when I face those colleagues. Besides, she has a higher position than me. Will she be less masculine in doing things in the future? Let's go back to Beishi, newlyweds can't be separated right away, right? If so, what is the difference from not being married? If a third party accidentally appeared, wouldn't it be game over. Thinking about it again, even if these things can be avoided, in the future, during the holidays, you should visit your relatives, so how can you be a good husband? He's already a husband in his early twenties, won't he look a little childish? I feel like I'm not good enough.
On the way back, the two of us were sitting in the back of a taxi. I said a lot to her, and I forgot what the group was, but I only remembered one sentence that said: "The piece of paper I gave you The name of the necklace is Gypsophila, and I chose it for a long time, and I hope you will shine forever like those stars.¡± After a while, I said again: ¡°Come back if you are not happy, the gate of my house Open for you at any time." I don't know why I said this to her? Is it to leave a way out for yourself? Or should I act generous, even if I want to break up, I still want to leave a good side for others? I don't know, I just said it casually.
It was past ten o'clock in the evening when I returned to Qiaozhen, and I got off at the intersection of the secondary road. As the saying goes: "People need face, trees need bark." I don't want my colleagues to see me with her, Because she looks weird all over, as if I was dumped by her. Seeing her face full of tears, people who don't know may think I dumped her.
The moment I got out of the car, she stopped me. Seeing her like that, she seemed to be afraid that I would seek love and commit suicide, but I still covered up my thoughts and lied to her: "You go back first, I will eat I'll go back after a midnight snack." Then, she paid the fare and asked the driver to drive her back to the supermarket. In fact, I didn't go to eat late at night, I just took a walk on the road alone, blowing the wind, and feeling the atmosphere of nature. I don't know why I did this, but I definitely didn't want to relax, I just thought it would feel better. , may be buried deep in my heart, I still care a little bit, but that point is so small that I can't feel it myself.
By the time I returned to the supermarket, it was already past eleven o'clock. Go upstairs, in the living room, surrounded by seven or eight men and women, Wang Jian is also here, only heard a burst of crying from the girls' dormitory, and then heard Li Xiaoling's voice, in the small voice, only her Concerned: "What's the matter? Why are you crying? Who bullied you? Tell me, I will help you out." In fact, Li Xiaoling called a few times when she was in Guizhou, and I also guessed that she had already guessed Li Xiaoling's words. Feng went out with me. At that time, I was very worried that Li Feng would talk about our affairs. Of course, I also wanted to hear how Li Xiaoling dealt with this matter, but Li Feng pushed the matter to work. , she hurriedly explained: "No, no one bullied me, don't get me wrong, lady boss, this is purely my own problem, not anyone else's business. I don't know why, I always feel a little annoyed recently, those suppliers are old I came to settle the payment when others were resting, so I felt very depressedMoreover, the work pressure was high" Hearing this??I stopped listening. I thought to myself, yes, how could she tell the things between us, and we were not really together, what if people misunderstood?
The next day, I overheard Pang Bin talking on the phone. At first, I didn't pay attention to it, but later I realized that the call was made to the legendary man. From Pang Bin's conversation, he learned that that person was Xiang Fengfeng, and Pang Bin was asking him if he said something to Li Feng that night that made her cry. Then the other side of the phone suddenly explained, not sure what they were talking about? Later, I heard Pang Bin laugh a few times, and then started joking with him. I hazily listened and didn¡¯t hear a little bit. This person probably met Li Feng when he went to Nanshi for training. He also opened a store in another small town, but no one helped to manage it. I want to find someone The woman who was traveling with him helped, so he fell in love with her. Hey, woman, that's it, reality! ! !
Since that day, I have started avoiding her, and she has also started avoiding me, feeling that as long as there are two of us alone together, we will feel awkward and unnatural. Since then, I have rarely accompanied her to the bank. Gradually, I became obsessed with work. After work in the evening, I didn¡¯t go upstairs to watch TV with everyone. I always hid in the computer room to watch for myself, watched movies, played Q, and occasionally went to the space Write a diary and completely isolate myself in the illusory world. I will not go up until they are all asleep. Sometimes I wonder why I promised her to work for a full year before leaving. If I left then, I wouldn¡¯t be so embarrassed now. Thinking back now, why did you want to do this in the first place? We are innocent and have done nothing wrong, so why should we avoid it? I really can't figure it out. Perhaps, this is the so-called psychological exclusion. (Remember the site URL: www.hlnovel.com