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105 Deep self-blame

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    When I saw the bustling crowd in the waiting hall again, I quickly adjusted my mental state as quickly as possible, because I didn't want my father to find out the slightest flaw.  Entering the inner room of the gastroscopy examination, I saw that my father who was sitting on the chair had almost recovered, so I helped my father to stand up and left this extremely uncomfortable place (Municipal People's Hospital).

    As soon as he saw me, my father started to question me a little bit worriedly.  When I said that the laboratory report would be available tomorrow, my father's slightly nervous expression immediately relaxed.  In my father's own words, there should be no major problems in this inspection.  Now, my father has fully believed that this gastroscopy is really just a routine inspection.  Because, in my father's consciousness, if there is a problem, the Municipal People's Hospital will definitely send the slices to Nanjing for examination, and it will take at least four or five days for them to come and go.  The reason why the gastroscopy in Tongxiang took five or six days was because the Tongxiang People's Hospital sent the slices to Hangzhou for testing.

    Seeing that my father did not suspect him, I immediately felt very grateful.  Now it seems that the 200 yuan "speed-up payment" was really worth it.  It was the quick results of the examination that really dispelled my father's last doubts.  I know that my father's current physical condition cannot withstand the huge mental shock.  I think you shouldn't feel contemptuous because of my self-satisfaction at that time.

    Back at home in the urban area, my mother and I were busy making food for my father first.  To check, my father hasn't eaten any food so far.

    Lunch that day was a relaxing and enjoyable lunch.  At least, father's joy is from the heart.  After all, my father wouldn't want his condition to worsen.

    After lunch, my father insisted on going back to his hometown in the country.  Father said that he would never go to Nanjing again.  My father was very disappointed by the performance of the so-called experts in Nanjing who gave him pain and powerlessness.  My father said, even if I go again, the doctor will not have a better way!  That being the case, why should I have to endure the pain of traveling and traveling for no reason?  It seems that my father is already a little afraid of the long journey.

    Of course, I couldn't bear to let my father, who was already weak, work hard again.  In my opinion, it's just a little adjustment in medicine, and I can completely solve the problem if I go there with my father's gastroscopy report.  So I very strongly agreed to let my father go back.  Just considering that my father has been in "high-intensity" exercise for the past two days, I am afraid that his body has not fully recovered, so I persuaded my father to rest here for one more day, so that he can take a look at the gastroscope himself  Check the reported results.

    "Is this necessary?" My father said disapprovingly, "Is it only here that I can rest? I go home (my hometown in the country, my father doesn't have much sense of identity with the house I just bought in the city) and it's the same  Can I rest? What's more, why do I have to see the gastroscopy report with my own eyes? After you see it, you can tell me the result of the test over the phone! Don't tell me, I still don't believe you can do it?"

    Seeing that my father has made up his mind, I naturally can't say anything more.  After my parents went back, I contacted my sister by phone.

    "Sister, Dad's gastroscope examination may not be very good this time. In all likelihood, it's a relapse." I know that my sister still has a glimmer of hope like me, so I just cut to the chase, so that my sister can have a mental health in advance.  Prepare.

    "Then, does that dad know?" My sister asked very worriedly.

    "How could I let Dad know!" I replied firmly.

    "Then, did Dad suspect anything?" My sister was still a little worried.

    "No. Dad has gone back very relieved now. Because the situation is not very good, I spent an extra two hundred yuan to get the test report in the shortest possible time. It is precisely because Dad listened to my explanation that he can get it tomorrow."  I have no doubts about the result, so I have no doubts." I explained in detail.

    "Oh, that's good!" My sister breathed a sigh of relief.

    "Oh, I really didn't expect that my father would face the crisis of relapse so soon." I sighed depressingly.

    "No one wants to see this kind of situation happen. Just do your best. Isn't there a saying that 'do your best and see the destiny', and now you can only 'see the destiny'." My sister comforted me.

    "As a child, you should try your best. But, sister, I have been thinking now, was it right to decide to operate on my father?" I asked with a heavy heart.

    "Hey, right, who can say for sure. However, at that time, when the attending physician said that surgery was possible, and the success rate of surgery was relatively high, how could we choose not to have surgery?"  , my sister seems to have some regretsIt was the original decision, but as the boss, she still comforted me while trying her best to control her emotions.

    "Now I miss the time when my father was in the hospital more and more. At that time, it was hard, but my heart was full of hope. You know, watching the situation of my father getting better every day, the uncontrollable excitement in my heart  Love?"

    "I know, I know. I hope my father will recover as strongly as you do!" My sister replied emotionally.

    "It's ridiculous. At that time, I thought I was right. I still secretly admire the boldness and carefulness of the attending physician. I was still thinking about how to thank the attending physician after my father fully recovered. Yes  Invite him to dinner? Or give him a pennant? But, I never thought that such a situation would happen?" I almost choked up and expressed the depression that had been suppressed in my heart for a long time.

    "I don't blame you, I don't blame you!" My sister comforted a little eagerly, "Even if my father really relapsed, no one would blame you. We know that all your decisions are for the good of your father; we know that  You did your best. Really, no one will blame you!"

    "Hey, actually, it's no wonder, I didn't take it to heart." I lamented, "Now that I think about it, the sentence I said to my cousin (the wife's name) has already oppressed my heart.  I still have surgery! Isn¡¯t this nonsense!¡¯, still fresh in my memory. However, I didn¡¯t have a clear idea of ??the size of the tumor at that time. If I knew that an esophageal tumor of nearly seven centimeters was considered very large, then maybe at that time  Your decision will be different."

    "Okay, the result hasn't come out yet. Even if you made a different decision at the time, you may not be able to figure it out right now? You can't speculate on the different decisions. What is the final result?" My sister further comforted  I said.  (Remember the site URL: www.hlnovel.com
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