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Chapter 961 Attribution

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    ?

    Chu Lihua first wrote down all the directions she wanted to develop, and then selected according to the books and her own conditions.

    ?Doctor of Chinese medicine, psychiatrist, writer, speaker, parenting expert, successful businessman, philanthropist

    Let's read the book first!

    After reading a chapter, Chu Lihua stopped to make a summary.

    Adler pointed out: Occupational problems involve the cooperation and division of labor in the whole society, interpersonal problems involve dealing with different people, and marital problems require us to cooperate with our partners.

    Therefore, occupational problems, interpersonal problems, and marriage problems, in Adler's view, are all problems of cooperation in the final analysis.

    The so-called meaning of life lies in how you face these three problems.

    So Adler made a conclusion that the meaning of a person can only be reflected in the communication and cooperation with others.

    If you separate yourself from others, then the meaning of your life is equal to zero.

    So what is the meaning of life?

    The only meaning is to contribute to others and the whole society.

    Yes, this is not a gimmick.  Only in this way can it really last for a long time.

    All human problems are cooperation problems, and life has only social meaning.  So how do I realize the meaning of my life in the process of surpassing myself?

    Chu Lihua asked herself.

    The answer is ready to come out, that is to establish cooperation with others.

    Specifically, how to reach cooperation can only be dealt with specifically on specific issues.

    Throughout Adler's theory, Chu Lihua can probably sum up a practical principle: When doing anything, don't just focus on yourself, but always think about your partner.

    Partner?  Client, friend, partner?

    Chu Lihua uses Adler's view on one of the three major problems of human beings, the marriage problem, to analyze first.

    Because, at present, she still has a better understanding of Qing Yunfei around her.

    Adler said that marriage is a job that requires two people to work together.

    On the one hand, the love between the two parties must last, and on the other hand, it also involves the education of the next generation.

    Chu Lihua decided to think about the relationship between husband and wife first.

    Adler said that the reason for many unhappy marriages is that many men, and even many women themselves, believe that men should be the head of the family and rule over women.

    Chu Lihua nodded secretly. Both she and Qing Yunfei had the same idea. The reason for their quarrel or disagreement was all about "who decides", "who is right", "who should listen to" and other such issues.

    This shows that the two of them don't know how to cooperate at all.  What does cooperation mean?  It means that neither party can be in a subordinate position, that is to say, the status of two people must be equal.

    If one party is always dominating the other, or even forcing the other, how can it be called cooperation?  So this marriage is definitely not happy.

    Chu Lihua wanted to dominate Qing Yunfei, but deep down in her heart, she was imitating her own mother.

    Because that's how my father was bit by bit

    No wonder Qing Yunfei's character is becoming more and more like his father.

    Always replace everything with silence.

    It turned out that they were all forced out by themselves!

    It's like that friend Wu Zhihong, who turned her husband who couldn't beat his wife into a terrible demon.

    So what should the correct sense of cooperation look like?

    Adler said that both husband and wife, especially men themselves, must understand that the current dominant position of men is the result of social culture.

    Therefore, if the husband earns more money, it is normal. This is the normal division of labor in the family life of the husband. Just because he earns more money than his wife, he should not feel that he is superior to others.

    On this point, Qing Yunfei doesn't seem to have Maybe.

    No, he did, he always said, "You don't do anything all day, what use are you for?"

    It was this sentence that made Chu Lihua feel that all her efforts were in vain.

    This is a problem left over from history.

    When you don't live together, you don't know it at all.

    Adler believes that men should not pursue the issue of earning and spending money, and should not focus on their own family division of labor, but should establish equal cooperation with their wives and see the partners in your marriage, that is,  Your wife's contribution, and co-management of the household with her.

    Here, let's talk frankly and franklyNo, now there is no such position.

    Of course, apart from the man, the woman, that is, Chu Lihua herself, also has to cooperate with her husband.

    Adler made a very moving summary, how can we have a happy marriage?  It is to take the initiative to care about the other party, and the degree of caring for the other party is higher than the degree of caring for yourself, so that it can be regarded as real cooperation.

    Chu Lihua, who has experienced marriage and love, has a deep understanding of the comparison. What Adler said is very wise.

    Just this, to Qing Yunfei, he would only say to Chu Lihua, "Don't give me those stupid things."

    this¡­¡­

    Do you want to talk openly and honestly?  Now I have no position.

    Let's first look at the issue of education for the next generation.  In Adler's view, whether it is school education or family education, the most important goal is to cultivate the child's ability to cooperate with others, and he must not be allowed to become a selfish person who only cares about himself.

    The three little guys have learned this well, because when three children play together, they always have to learn to cooperate slowly.

    Chu Lihua's old mother was deeply comforted, and I was a little grateful to my mother for forcing Xiaoqi to me.

    Adler gave an example of the Oedipus complex in his book.

    Chu Lihua has never understood this. Why would a big man be morbidly attached to his mother?

    Adler's point is that because this man has not established a cooperative relationship with others.

    His mother obeyed him, but he couldn't cooperate with anyone except his own mother; so he relied more strongly on his mother and wanted to possess her.

    If he can establish a cooperative relationship with other people, there will be no Oedipus complex.

    The word Oedipus complex was invented by Freud.  He thinks this is a sexual issue, and thinks that men want to marry their mothers and kill their fathers, so they are called Oedipus.

    According to Adler, then this is not an Oedipus, but an inability to establish cooperation with others. According to the current saying, this is called "Ma Baonan".

    In fact, Chu Lihua has always suspected that Qing Yunfei is such a person.

    Obedient to his mother, even overprotective of his mother.

    Just like the drug withdrawal incident last time, as long as someone came forward and said it, the matter would not be so troublesome.

    But Qing Yunfei would rather watch him find a way to communicate with the doctor than ask his mother for help.  (Remember the site URL: www.hlnovel.com
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