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Chapter 286 The Pain of Inferiority

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    ?

    Chu Lihua felt that it was better to talk about her own affairs first.  Let Xiner's mother calm down, she feels that she is always unable to speak.  It's as if I haven't talked to anyone before.

    ——"Actually, I am different from you. It is because of my own defects that I go further and further down the wrong path."

    ——"As the saying goes, no one is perfect, and no one has a flaw. Do you think I am normal now? But I am actually not much different from a blind person. I can only see  It’s just something very close. To be honest, what do you look like now? Actually, I don’t even know.”

    Chu Lihua didn't know why.  Maybe it was sympathy or something else, suddenly she also wanted to open her heart to the poor man in front of her, instead of always hiding her vision from outsiders like before, and she didn't even dare to look at the poor man in front of her.  Looking down at the phone.  Not to mention things like going out to eat and ordering menus.

    Chu Lihua always uses the excuse that she likes potatoes very much, and only orders dishes related to potatoes wherever she goes, because such dishes are so common that basically any restaurant will have them.  That way no one would know her embarrassment at not being able to see the menu.

    ——"When I was in high school, I was traveling with my relatives, and I had a car accident, resulting in a comminuted fracture of my left leg.

    The place where the accident happened was in a mountainous area, and the technology and equipment of the hospital in the small county next to it were very backward. It was lucky that no one was limping, but it was dealt with in a hurry.

    Since then, there have been shocking centipede-like scars on my legs, and the traces of stitching and removing steel plates are clearly visible, and the wounds are uneven, bumpy, and there are sarcomas like things one by one.

    I did rehabilitation, but the wound was too long and the effect was minimal.

    Until now, when I take a shower, looking at the scar, I still pick up the rubbing cloth and rub it desperately, I want to rub it off!  Bloody and bloody too!  It's okay to rot!  God knows, even after so many years, every time I see it, I still want to amputate it!

    too ugly!  It's really ugly!

    I just want to shrink myself into a ball, a ball that no one can see, and stay quietly in a dark corner.  "

    Perhaps inspired by Chu Lihua, Xiner's mother suddenly talked about her sad past.

    ——"Actually, these are all accidents. Maybe you will say to me that things didn't happen to me, but you don't know of cases where accidents lead to more serious deformities.

    My father lost his entire leg in an accident.  But he is strong and independent, confident and brave, and he does not pretend to be pitiful and beg for food on the street like those disabled people.  Instead, he taught himself the craft and set up a small stall on the street. His craft is the best on the street, and of course the business is also the best.  It is also the most admired.  Because he does business at a fair price and his workmanship is particularly good.  He lived a normal life completely on his own.  God will always fail to take care of everyone in some areas, thus allowing other disasters to take advantage of, but this does not mean that we are different from others.  "

    Chu Lihua admired her father for this.

    ——"But when I felt extremely inferior because of this incident, I made an irreparable mistake in the end. This also caused Xiner to lose her father now. But I have no way to continue this mistake  , let Xiner have a father who exists in name only."

    When Xiner's mother said this, tears finally slid down her cheeks amidst sobs-

    "Would you like to share your story with me?"

    Chu Lihua walked over involuntarily, and gently held her hand, with what he thought was warmth in her voice.

    Xin'er's mother's tears kept falling down in big ones, and even dripped onto Chu Lihua's and her hands that were clasping each other.  As for Xin'er, when she saw her mother crying, she suddenly stopped crying, walked over slowly, and took her mother's other hand.  See this scene.  Chu Lihua couldn't help her eyes getting wet.  She picked up the little girl and sat on her lap, watching her mother encourage her.

    The cry of Xiner's mother echoed in the room. Chu Lihua and Xiner had been watching her quietly.

    After about ten minutes, the crying gradually stopped.

    Chu Lihua handed over a handkerchief, and after Xiner's mother wiped away her tears and blew her nose, she began to tell her story and experience.

    ——"I am an art student, and my husband and I are classmates in college. His surname is Liu, he comes from a very poor rural area, he went to school late, and he repeated it for three years. He is four years older than me.

    ? I chose to be an art student not because I wanted to take the shortcut of the college entrance examination, but because??Really interested in drawing.  My grandfather is a painter, and he is well-known in the local area. Growing up with him, my love for color has grown day by day.  "

    Xin'er's mother paused, at this moment he seemed to have begun to fall into the memories of his past.

    ——"With my heaviness and low self-esteem, I didn't perform very well in the college entrance examination. I entered my third choice, a second university in another city in the province. But after entering the university, I discovered that my life  This did not open a new chapter.

    Students in the art department, more than 80% of their families are either rich or expensive. They buy sky-high imported paints without blinking their eyes, and they wear luxury goods.

    My family is considered well-off, but it is difficult to integrate with them. I am so inconspicuous among classmates who are as glamorous as flowers and butterflies, and I am getting more and more inferior.  .

    However, classmate Liu noticed me.

    He often praised my paintings in private, not only that, but I spend more than 10 hours in the studio every day.  I was bumped into by him by chance, and he also started to come to the studio every day, painting not far from me.

    I paint gouache, he paints watercolor, the brush rustles against the ink and wash, how can you not be tempted?

    Even my paintings have changed. I used to make good use of cool colors, various dark blues, desperate blacks, and lonely grays, but now they have become colorful and warm with joy.

    ?For a girl who has just started a relationship and has low self-esteem, I can feel the changes in myself, and I dare not say that I like it.

    But when I wake up in the morning, I will have an inexplicable expectation. I like to go to the studio more and more, just to enjoy the silent but tacit time.  "

    When Xiner's mother said this, she paused again, as if she was recalling, as if she was annoyed.

    Chu Lihua didn't answer, but quietly looked at her encouragingly, and shook her hand tightly, as if to give her the courage to continue talking.  (Remember the site URL: www.hlnovel.com
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