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Chapter Thirteen Let it be (3)

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    ?

    In the university town during the summer vacation, there are too many bright sunshine, which makes this brave new world seem empty and even a bit desolate.

    Because of the silence, when I look at Roger, I always hear Shelia's voice; when I look at Beichuan, I always hear his brother's voice.

    Very early on, I discovered that I had auditory hallucinations.  I am always here and now, hearing the voices of that time and that place.  For example, when the surrounding area is quiet, I will hear the bell of my grandfather¡¯s school in the country, or the pine waves at night.  A middle-aged man passing by in a flash, the rustling sound of his passing will make me follow my father's piano

    There are many, many more.

    Roger said I was distracted, Shelia said I was out of my body (Jacques said the same).  Once your heart is not here, your body and brain are on one side.

    I don't know, in their eyes, am I a flawed person?  If what they appreciate happens to be my flaws, what a blow it will be to me!

    Shelia said that a fool may be a genius in a certain way, but a nerd is definitely a real fool.  I really worry that they are competing to show that they have better taste than others by appreciating and protecting some of my flaws.

    In the final analysis, being dazed and out of my body, is it another congenital hypoplasia of mine?  Some children have congenital hypoplasia of one kind or another, such as my eyes, amblyopia plus strabismus, myopia, and flashes of light. Dad said that the doctor told grandpa very early that it was congenital hypoplasia.

    For eye problems, Roger said that surgery is possible, and glasses can also be worn.  For this, he searched the Internet for two hours.

    Some days, it seems like I only use it for a few hours a day and then it's gone.

    Roger has many friends, and we do too many things: swimming, playing ball, playing games.  I ran around happily, helping the girls carry this and that, or guarding clothes by the lake, picking up balls on the side of the court, cheerful and lively, constantly witty, and imitating someone from time to time, which often irritated everyone  Laugh.

    Beichuan was assigned to Shelia, so I don't have to worry about him.  She takes him with her all the time, like taking care of her cat, playing, doing things, and visiting small shops.

    Sometimes, they would suddenly disappear, and Roger and his friends, Shelia, Kitagawa, did not know where they went.  My surroundings were empty, in the courtyard, I looked up at the sun, and immediately my eyes became black, my head was dizzy, and my mind was full of golden lights.

    I want to see the time.  Since time passes so easily, I want to watch it go.

    I can never do it.

    Time is too complicated!  It has hidden itself in everything, leaving no trace.  Probably, you can only catch its shadow from the changes of various things, and look for its small tail that is inadvertently exposed.

    57

    I see Shelia's pink face through the sun-baked bras and dresses on the rope.

    Her eyes narrowed like a cat in the sun.

    I was so close to her, and the sun was so bright, I could almost see the down on her face - if not a hallucination.  Her eyelashes are long and trembling slightly.

    She is like a doll, with a big head, a small body, and extremely small arms.

    She just stood in the sun, slanting, facing the sun, looking into the distance.  She looked like a cat, a very beautiful cat.

    I don't know what she is looking at.  Maybe she didn't know it herself.  She just looked into the distance like that, very mysterious.

    Everyone likes her.  I also especially like her when I think she looks like a beautiful cat.  I happily thought that I could look at her like this until Beichuan and I went back to Roger's dormitory at night.

    Will she sing like Angela Chang?  That explosive, crystal-clear, glass-like voice, I very much hope that that voice will continue to come out of her mouth.  Perhaps, at our concert, we can hear it.

    I'm waiting.

    After watching for a long time, you will suddenly think, do cats have expressions?  Has anyone ever seen a cat laugh?  Wish someone had seen it.

    For her sake, I hope cats can laugh, have expressions, and express their emotions through their eyes and faces.

    I also want the cat to talk.

    What kind of scene was that!

    A cat that can talk, a cat that can laugh, might scare people to death, right?

    I thought, I won't.  I'll have a nice talk with it.

    Some things I never say to people, I also say to it.  I will hide it in my bag, in my pocket.  I'd take it for itself, and maybe "he" or "she."  As to whether it is a cat or a person, what?Live helplessly.  You, just be a child, smaller, and then smaller, until you feel that there is only happiness and nothing else!  "

    "But, Beichuan is so small, so unhappy"

    "We're trying to find a way!"

    I seem to understand why I like Roger.  In fact, I like being around people who are older than me, who are smart, well informed, happy, funny, and confident.  I envy them and want to be like them.

    Sometimes, I think, to become a kind of person, you must first choose a track for your own movement.  When I entered middle school, I knew that everything in the world is in motion and changing.  The child becomes grandpa, today becomes yesterday, the first quarter moon becomes the last quarter moon, the clouds become rain We ourselves are in motion, time is in motion, and the sun and moon are in motion.

    That's right, you have to find your own track first, and then, like taking a car, you have to stop again and again, elementary school, middle school.  When I entered the university station, I became people like Roger and the others.

    Anxiety suddenly weighed heavily on me¡ªI couldn't find the car I wanted to get into, or rather, the car had already driven away, leaving me far behind.

    After Roger ate the bread, he sipped his overnight tea and chatted with me.

    "Indian," he looked at me very gently, "don't you miss home?"

    "In no mood."

    "I kind of thought about it. I was supposed to go home, or go on a trip, or take a summer job. But, because of her, I didn't go anywhere, and I couldn't do anything."

    "You are in love with him."

    "Yeah, Nietzsche said that love is sickness!" He sighed. "I fell in love with her, wrote music for her, and stayed in school for her. Sometimes I am very troubled, thinking about her, and I can't do anything. It's me  Emotional intelligence is too low."

    I don't know how to comfort him.

    "Indian, you will definitely be better than me in the future."

    I smirked: "Impossible. How could I?"

    "Really. You are not an ordinary waif. You are smart, calm and steady."

    "I?"

    "Do you know why I brought you here?"

    "Thisyou will take pity on stray catsof course," I don't know what to say, "Of course, some people say that stray cats cannot be taken in and will bring bad luck to peopleI mean  " I kept getting worse.

    He interrupted me: "I don't believe in those. I don't believe in constellations or anything. Indian, tell you, the first time I saw you and listened to you sing, I shed tears."

    "That day? Couldn't you stop laughing?"

    "After laughing."

    "oh."

    "I think there is something about you, very familiar, very similar to me."

    "what?"

    "Forget it, don't ask, then you have to talk about the history of the revolutionary family again."

    He went to the bathroom, and when he came back, the calmness and gentleness became more obvious, as if he had reached middle age.

    "Indy, I should teach you something. Tell me, what do you want to learn?"

    I blurted out: "Learn computer, go online."

    "oh."

    I was afraid that he would find it troublesome: "Why don't you teach me how to use QQ first."

    "Do you want to chat with friends?" What he means is: Do you have friends too?

    "Well. I have friends and I want to find them."

    He helped me apply for QQ, and then found Jacques in a chat room in Shenzhen.  As soon as he played "Ultraman looking for Jacques", there was a question called "Latent and Conspiracy": "Where did Ultraman meet Jacques?"

    "Guangzhou, Sanyuanli."

    Roger rushed to type.

    "Latent and Conspiracy" immediately added me as a friend and invited me to chat on QQ.

    He first asked me to answer a question: "What animal did you kill, but it shed your own blood?" After I got the answer right, he really appeared and talked to me.

    This is Jacques' style, who likes to play with clever things, even if it is a childish brain teaser.

    This question was so easy that before I could speak, Roger typed two words: "Mosquito."

    "Latent and Plot" showed a big smile: "Hello, Ultraman, I am Jacques!"

    I screamed with excitement!

    Roger said: "Found it?"

    I was very happy: "That's him, he is Jacques!"

    Roger stepped aside, and I couldn't wait to tell Jacques that he had made a mistake: Mosquitoes are insects, not animals.

    ? I just finished typing the worm word, but I haven't sent it yet, so the power went out.  I heard Roger let out a long breath and collapsed on the bed.

    (Address of Xili's other works: "The Pain of Ruin" http://www.17k.com/book/56782.html;

    "Twelve Heavens" http://www.17k.com/book/56783.html;

    "Cat" (http://www.17k.com/book/58588.html) (remember this website URL: www.hlnovel.com)??Send, power outage.  I heard Roger let out a long breath and collapsed on the bed.

    (Address of Xili's other works: "The Pain of Ruin" http://www.17k.com/book/56782.html;

    "Twelve Heavens" http://www.17k.com/book/56783.html;

    "Cat" http://www.17k.com/book/58588.html ) (remember this website URL: www.hlnovel.com
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