Xiaoshi's hands were empty and her heart was empty, so she knew that Zhou Shaoting hadn't forgiven herself, and perhaps, never would.
She grabbed the quilt with her hands that had nowhere to rest, pulled the quilt to her chin, arched her legs, and curled up her whole body to resist the ubiquitous cold.
"Do you regret it?"
Zhou Shaoting spoke suddenly, and his low voice fell slowly, every word seemed to hit Xiaoshi's heart.
Xiao Shi nodded vigorously, pressed the quilt to her lips, and whimpered, "I was wrong, Shao Ting, I'm sorry, I'm sorry"
Zhou Shaoting sighed unrecognizably, and said calmly: "You didn't feel sorry for me, but the child is really a pity."
Xiaoshi folded her arms around her knees, buried her face, suppressed her sobs, and trembled uncontrollably.
Zhou Shaoting finally couldn't stand it anymore, sat down opposite her, gently raised his hand, and helped her straighten her messy temple hair, his movements were as usual, natural and gentle.
His voice was also very gentle, and he couldn't hear the meaning of blame, "Silly girl, I don't regret it after asking you, it's not about the child."
Xiaoshi held back her sobs, raised her eyes to look at Zhou Shaoting, in the darkness, her eyes were filled with lingling water, but because of the heavy sadness, they lost their previous clarity.
Zhou Shaoting raised his hand again, wiped away the tears on her face with his thumb, and said slowly: "I mean, if time can go back to before our reunion, and you have a chance to choose again, then, don't you Would you rather never have happened?"
Xiaoshi couldn't fully understand what he meant, but she had thought about this question these days.
From the heart, compared with the regret and grief of losing a child, it seems that the numbness that nothing happened is easier to bear.
Before she could figure out how to answer, the corners of Zhou Shaoting's lips curled up in a sad arc, "Okay, needless to say."
He looked at Xiaoshi deeply, eyebrows raised, and his slender fingers outlined the outline of her thin cheeks, complaining and regretting, "Look at you, why did you hurt yourself so much? Why didn't you tell me earlier?"
Xiaoshi couldn't understand more and more, and didn't know what to say. She just felt sad and desolate in her heart, and she shed two lines of tears unconsciously.
Zhou Shaoting took his hand away from her cheek with some reluctance, and pressed it between his brows. After a moment of silence, he shook his head suddenly, as if he was laughing at himself.
He found himself asking a very stupid question. He asked Xiaoshi why she didn't say that she didn't want to be with him and would rather go back to the past and pretend nothing happened?
But the problem is, she said it!
From their reunion to the current situation, she has been talking, in various ways.
She declined his help several times, rejected the hospital he arranged for her father, rejected Yijiang's high-paying offer, and even vehemently refused to be his woman.
She resigned, she closed the door, she wanted to escape from "Yinan Valley", she was afraid of his closeness, and she even shed tears of grievance at such a moment of forgetfulness
It wasn't until he was forced by him that there was no escape, no escape, that he had no choice but to compromise.
Perhaps, in their relationship, he has always been leading and enjoying, like being in Eden, with endless happiness. But she is not really willing, always with some hesitation and accommodation.
However, her contradictory resistance was deliberately ignored by his self-willedness.
If you think about it this way, the recording in Sun Xiaonan's hand is not so difficult to understand. It was Xiaoshi's expression of suppressed emotions all the time, and it was the thoughts and choices in her heart that he didn't know about.
"I wouldn't give birth to him for that reason."
"This child was an accident, and I didn't expect it."
"At the beginning? Well, even if it's all my fault."
"I, can leave Zhou Shaoting."
"I can. I can. I can"
Whenever these voices linger in his mind, Zhou Shaoting's heart twitches violently.
He took his hand from between his eyebrows, put it on his lap, turned around, and said to the nothingness in front of him: "Since I came back and met you this time, until now, we have walked step by step, and I have not been able to give you what you want." Happiness, but it has brought you so much harm. I am the one who is wrong, I am too self-righteous."
He lowered his eyes, was silent for a moment, then turned his head to look at Xiaoshi, put his hand on her knee, and unconsciously stroked the back of her hand with his thumb, and said seriously: "I have thought about it, my love is right For you, it may be a bondage. Therefore, youof.
Now she just wants to go quietly, and doesn't want to disturb Aunt Tao and Jin Xin, so as not to add to the sadness of everyone, or cause another trouble.
Zhou Shaoting will give them an explanation, even if he doesn't explain, it doesn't matter.
Why must there be a reason?
There are so many people you meet in this life, most of them are passers-by in a hurry. She and them are just passers-by in each other's lives. They once had warm love. However, once the fate is broken, it will be natural .
As for the farewell she owed, let's leave it for later, when she can come out of this haze, let's make it up.
Xiaoshi opened the large wardrobe, and she and Zhou Shaoting's clothes were hung together, half of them were colorful and in different shapes; the other half were only black, white and gray, neat suit shirts.
She deliberately didn't look at those men's clothes, and only focused on picking out her own clothes, but she was still inevitably hit by memories. (Remember the site URL: www.hlnovel.com