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062 no regrets

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    ?

    After listening to my answer, my father's mood improved obviously.  Under the influence of my father, the worries in my heart have also faded a lot.  No matter how my father plans, I cherish this precious opportunity to dedicate one last time to my father.  Even if my father was still thinking of my younger brother (saving money) in every possible way before his death, I don't care.  Because, I am happy to spend money for my father!  Spending money for one's own father would never be a burden, but an honor.

    Facing the imminent death, in fact, both my father and I should be depressed.  However, after reaching a consensus on the issue of funeral expenses, both my father and I couldn't help showing a feeling of joy from the bottom of our hearts.  Therefore, the discussion that followed was extraordinarily brisk.

    Father was born and grew up in the old society, so the feudal ideology is deeply rooted.  My father told me that a wooden coffin must be prepared for him and he must be buried.  In the current situation, I will naturally not refuse my father's request, no matter whether it is reasonable or not.

    This time, my father did behave abnormally.  Because my father is a man of few words, it is absolutely unprecedented for him to talk to me for so long at one time.  However, this time it was by no means a flashback.  But after everything that needed to be explained was clearly explained, the father once again returned to his former taciturn nature.

    Since then, my father has hardly spoken again.  Although I insisted on not disclosing the more terrifying illnesses such as "advanced" and "less than a month" to my father, my father, who already knew he was going to die, just waited for death blindly after talking to me for the last time.  Although my father's spirit has not completely collapsed, I can see that he has lost all survival instincts.  In fact, I had expected such a bad situation a long time ago, but I didn't expect it to come so quickly.  I know that my father really didn't have long.

    While I was taking care of my father day and night, I was also planning various preparations for his funeral.  The most urgent thing is the matter of the coffin.  I asked someone to find an old carpenter classmate who grew up naked since childhood, and after explaining the standard of the wooden coffin, I asked the old classmate to help make the wooden coffin as quickly as possible.  Of course, all expenses are paid by me.  Even without my father's entrustment, it would be difficult for me as an elder brother to have the cheek to ask my younger brother for money.

    Fortunately, the wooden coffin was finally made before his father passed away.  When my father saw the huge and majestic coffin with his own eyes, a rare wave finally appeared in his lifeless expression.  As I supported my father, I could clearly feel the surge of joy emanating from his dying and frail body.  After a while of excitement, my father's mood gradually calmed down.  After that, there was a little more peace in the heavy dead look on his father's face.

    The so-called "knowing the father is like a son", I know that the father at the last moment died safely.  In fact, my father had many regrets in his later years.  However, before the father closed his eyes, these regrets were made up one by one.  Because of my eccentricity, the father and son are at odds, but now the eldest son who is at odds with him can accompany him day and night; because of his eccentricity, the brothers are at odds, but now the eldest son and the younger son  Because my critical illness has been reconciled as before; because the times are different, people who have passed away are only allowed to be cremated now, but the filial elder son has promised himself that he will definitely be buried; in addition, the younger son has grown up and is completely self-reliant  Now, father has nothing to worry about.

    However, mental peace cannot alleviate physical pain.  There is another scary thing about "liver cancer", that is "pain"!  As the condition worsened, the pain on my father's body became more and more severe.  My father has a strong character, and at the beginning, he just endured silently.  I can often see my father sweating profusely from the excruciating pain.  I only hate that I can't bear the pain instead of my father.  I can only help my father wipe off the sweat, and I can only try to relieve his pain with a crappy massage My father's appetite is getting worse day by day, and I can see that his father is getting weaker and weaker.  But, I can't do anything, I can only watch helplessly.  This is definitely a cruel mental torture!

    I really couldn't bear to see my father in such pain, so I tried every means to raise anesthetics everywhere.  At that time, the drug control was not as strict as it is now, and through certain means and borrowing certain relationships, it was still possible to raise a lot.  Anesthetics were obtained, but at the beginning, my father was determined not to use them.  My father is extremely stubborn, so I have no choice but to continue to watch my father suffer.

    In the last few days, my father finally couldn't stand it any longer.  The father wailed hoarsely, and the father rolled all over the bed Finally, the father gave in.  After taking the anesthetic, my father finally calmed down!  This time, my father finally spoke in a rare way. Although his voice was very weak, I still??Clear.  "I, I use anesthesia, because I don't want to make a fool of myself in front of people." Alas, the stubborn father all his life is actually very face-saving!  Otherwise, when I promised to make my father's funeral a good one, he wouldn't look so happy.

    Because of the anesthetics used, my father seemed very quiet in the last two days.  Seeing my father lying quietly on the bed, watching my father quietly falling asleep the torment in my heart was not as strong as before.  Alas, my father has suffered a lot these days.  The pain was so bad that I couldn't eat well, and I couldn't sleep well.  The father at that time could really be called "life is better than death"!  Therefore, I was somewhat happy that my father was finally able to agree to the use of anesthesia.

    However, I heard from others later.  This anesthetic cannot be abused. If it is used too much, the effect will gradually decrease.  In other words, although I had prepared a large amount of anesthetic, if I had used it from the beginning, maybe in the last few days, my father would still be writhing on the bed in pain.  Perhaps it was because of my father's stubborn personality that we used the anesthetic correctly.

    ?Because there was no pain, my father walked very peacefully!  At that time, almost all my father's relatives were in front of me. Of course, due to fear of contagion, everyone except me kept a long enough distance from my father.  I was the only one sitting on my father's bed, and my father held my hand tightly.  To this day, I still remember that very strange scene.  My father breathed his last breath of hot air into my face before closing his eyes.  (Remember the site URL: www.hlnovel.com
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