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Chapter 32 (The Finale) The Hope of Living

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    ?

    Encouraged by Guodong, I bravely faced various physical examinations.  Guodong accompanied me throughout the whole process, which made me feel warm and accepted each challenge calmly.

    In the process of waiting for the result, I asked Guodong to go shopping with me.  At the mall, I spent what little money I had on me and bought him a tie.  I have never bought him a gift. If I am gone, I hope this tie will be the only souvenir he has for me.

    Guodong understood my thoughts and said emotionally: "Yuyan, nothing can represent you. Only when you are by my side is the best souvenir."

    I couldn't help crying again, regretting some past actions. Is it true that only when you lose, can you learn to cherish it?  Perhaps, only those who have experienced the test of life and death can comprehend the principles of life.  Because of him, I am so reluctant to let go of this world, longing for God to give me another hope of life.

    When he got all my test results from the doctor, I couldn't calm down anymore, I had to suppress my pounding heartbeat, and at the same time cast an earnest look at him.  That look is the desire for life, the longing for the future.

    His expression was a bit dignified, which made my heart a little cold, and I mustered up the courage to ask: "Guodong, please tell me the truth, how long can I live?"

    Guodong smiled bitterly and said, "Yuyan, you stopped me. I'm not a god, and I can't predict your life, just like I can't predict myself."

    I was shocked, "Could it be me?"

    "Not only did your tumor not spread, it even shrank a lot. But this is not the result I want. Because it didn't disappear in the end, and there is still a little bit left in the body."

    I was surprised, happy and worried, "Should I continue to take that targeted drug?"

    My worry is obvious. Although the drug saved my life, the price is beyond what Guodong and I can bear.  I long to live, but I don't want to use money to continue my life.  Wasn't the hole dug for him big enough?  I know it well, because the foreign debts I owe are enough for him to repay for many years.

    Guodong shook his head, "No, you can't continue taking that medicine."

    I was overjoyed, "Really?"

    "Well, if you take too much of that medicine, it will not only cause side effects, but also develop drug resistance."

    I had mixed feelings in my heart, "Does the doctor say there is another way?"

    "have!"

    My eyes immediately glowed with brilliance, "What can I do?"

    "Do surgery!"

    My heart hung up again, "Did the doctor say that the operation is impossible?"

    "At that time, your tumor spread very badly, and surgery could not eradicate it. Now it is fine, your lesion has been concentrated to a point, and surgery is very easy. It can be eradicated with one knife."

    I bowed my head and pondered: "Is it going to cost a lot of money?"

    He shook his head, "This operation is not considered a major operation. I have a way to raise the money, but there is one thing I can't do."

    "Which point?"

    "You are going to suffer a little, and you have to endure a little pain."

    "Are you afraid of my pain?"

    "Yes, at this point, I can't empathize with you."

    My nose was sore, "After so much, am I still afraid of pain? I'm worried that I won't be able to get off the operating table."

    "No, the doctor said that the risk of this operation is not high, and you will be fine."

    I shook my head sadly, "Any surgery has risks. I'm worried that after the anesthesia makes me sleepy, I won't be able to open my eyes again."

    "Yuyan, no."

    My mood was extremely depressed, "Can I not have surgery?"

    "I'm afraid it can't be done. Once you stop taking the medicine, that tumor may recur. The best way is to cut the grass and get rid of the roots."

    I thought for a long time before saying, "Let me think about it."

    "Okay, I'll give you three days."

    "Well, I want to use these three days to stay at home and think about it."

    He froze, "You want to think behind closed doors?"

    "Um."

    He pondered for a moment, "Okay."

    In the next few days, I was like a practitioner, shutting myself in the room, lazing on the bed all day, staring at the ceiling in a daze.

    I have thought a lot in my mind

    During those days in Hainan, I was always surrounded by warmth and love. For a while, I was carefree. Because my life was coming to an end, I no longer worried about gains and losses in the future.  However, he changed all that and made me??While life rekindled hope, it also picked up the forgotten troubles.  What the hell am I struggling with, I can't even tell myself.

    Life is like a pendulum, swinging between pursuit and disillusionment.  Human wisdom lies in the insight into one's own shortcomings.  The value of a person lies in knowing how to fulfill their respective responsibilities.  If I unfortunately die, I will not be able to bear it.  And the only clear responsibility I can take is to repay the love Guodong gave me.

    I kept looking back at the past bit by bit, and sighed angrily from time to time, I missed too much.  Life is an out-of-print movie that cannot be played back. Some things, no matter how hard you try, if you can¡¯t go back, you can¡¯t go back. Even if you really go back, you will find that everything has changed beyond recognition.  In the memory of the bottom of my heart.

    Two days passed.

    "Yuyan, how are you thinking?"

    I answered irrelevantly, "Guodong, I've lived half my life. Looking back on the years I have passed, I really feel unwilling. There are always so many regrets and disappointments filling my brain. Except for you, I have almost been  Everyone has forgotten that even if you are lucky enough to survive, you don¡¯t know what else to do except to repay your love.¡±

    "When you feel regret and disappointment, you will be very depressed. In fact, from another perspective, disappointment and regret are also a kind of happiness, which proves that your dreams and expectations are still there. You have to bow your head when you do things, how much you can sink your thoughts, and you can bear it  How much patience determines what you can do; to be a person, you have to raise your head, how much you can bear the gaze, how much pressure you can resist, determines who you can be."

    I stared at him for a while, and finally broke the silence, "I agree to the operation!"

    Perhaps, he had expected this result a long time ago and had already quietly prepared it. Less than two days after my reply, he arranged for me to be hospitalized and have an operation three days later.

    My mood that should have been relaxed became heavy, and I was anxious about this operation, and I started thinking wildly again.  Apparently, I couldn't let go of too many things.

    The day before the operation, I suddenly received a message from Li Xiaohui¡ª¡ª

    Sister Yuyan, I learned that you are going to have surgery tomorrow, so I wanted to visit you.  But there are too many things in the company, and I can't leave for the time being, so I can only go back in a few days.  By then, your surgery should be over.  We sisters can open up and talk about it.  Please don't feel any pressure.  Fate has given you an ordeal, and when you hold on tenaciously, please believe that fate will give you the best result, including love and happiness.

    ?Her WeChat message made me extremely astonished, and I began to be in a daze, and then an inexplicable emotion emerged in my heart.

    At this moment, the door of the ward was pushed open, and Guodong walked in hurriedly.  I gazed at him with grateful eyes.  He looked pleased, "Yuyan, who is here?"

    It turned out that Guodong was not the only one who came in, there were a series of people behind him.  When I saw the person, I was dumbfounded.

    They were my mother, father, brother, and sister-in-law in turn. Looking at their concerned faces, their eyes blurred instantly.

    When my life was going through another test, I was finally surrounded by family affection.  All this is due to Guodong.  I finally realized that with him in this life, I am no longer lonely and alone in the long journey of life. It is he who silently transmits a beam of light in the illusion, allowing me to feel the warmth of the sun in the long darkness, and to be alive.  hope.

    ? On the second day, when I was pushed into the operating room, I was still moved. Under the expectant and encouraging eyes of many relatives, I was full of confidence to win.  This is the first surgery in my life, and it will definitely be a turning point in my life.  I no longer have any fear, I want to reborn myself and be reborn from Nirvana!

    I love you!

    These were the last words I said to Guodong before I was pushed into the operating room.  The three words that should have been easy to say, but at this special moment, I mustered up the courage to say them.  At that moment, I became extremely strong, because there was love in my heart.

    Two months later, I wore a brand new professional suit and reappeared in the familiar job position.  My look is still so impressive, as if the years of youth have just begun, enjoying the infinite splendor that life will bring to me in the future.

    (End of the book)

    Congratulations to book friends:

    "Happy Kaner" is just a small drink in life. It is currently the shortest one among my published works, but no matter which one of my works has different connotations, each work instills my  Different perceptions of society and life.  It embodies my philosophy of life.

    The work "Watching Without Regrets", which is still uploaded at present, has also been completed, but it will have to wait until the end of the year for the upload to be completed.  This work also expresses my longing for a life.

    Currently, I have stopped writing, because after finishing the creation of "Great Country Card", I suddenly feel that it is very difficult to surpass this work that is supported by the Chinese Writers Association.  Trying to write a few chapters of new work, but it is difficult to satisfy myself, so I have to put myself in a fallow period.

    As a realist writer, my longing and eulogy for life will never stop. Once I encounter a realistic story that needs to be eulogized, I will definitely record it with passion.  At the same time, I hope that book friends will pay attention to my other works.  Realism full of positive energy such as "The Hero of the Island", "He and His Silly Mother", "The Bottom Line of Life", "The Secret of the Distance", "The Age of Two Children", "Save You", "Choose a Stepfather", "Never Give Up" and so on.  work.

    Dear book friends: Let's not say goodbye!  (Remember the site URL: www.hlnovel.com)??It is difficult to surpass this work that is supported by the Chinese Writers Association.  Trying to write a few chapters of new work, but it is difficult to satisfy myself, so I have to put myself in a fallow period.

    As a realist writer, my longing and eulogy for life will never stop. Once I encounter a realistic story that needs to be eulogized, I will definitely record it with passion.  At the same time, I hope that book friends will pay attention to my other works.  Realism full of positive energy such as "The Hero of the Island", "He and His Silly Mother", "The Bottom Line of Life", "The Secret of the Distance", "The Age of Two Children", "Save You", "Choose a Stepfather", "Never Give Up" and so on.  work.

    Dear book friends: Let's not say goodbye!  (Remember the site URL: www.hlnovel.com
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