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hesitating

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    ?

    I had another nightmare last night. In the dream, something seemed to hold my head. Suddenly, I couldn¡¯t move my head at all. With great fear, I struggled to wake up from the dream. The first thing I did after regaining consciousness  Just get up and turn on the light.

    ? In the morning, I asked sister gy if she would ask for leave two days before the National Day, she said no, you explained that because jy had already asked for leave, lm seemed to be asking for leave, so first ask her if she would also ask for leave.  Knowing that there are still people on duty in the unit, I feel relieved, and told lz that I want to ask for leave to go home.  In fact, it's not interesting to stay here, it's better to go home and spend the Mid-Autumn Festival with my parents.

    The SLR repaired yesterday still had some problems today, so I went to them to repair it again.  On the way, zl WeChat said that he could ask for leave.  In the repair shop, he sent you an invitation letter from Gansu, and said, if the other party says it¡¯s too late to register, then don¡¯t go, it¡¯s not worthwhile to spend 4 days going to a province for activities, and the department has a lot of things to do  of.  You feel very sad, and quickly find headphones to listen to the song, planning to use the time of 2 songs to make a decision whether to ask him if he can choose not to go if the unit is busy.  Before finishing listening to a song, lz sent a group message saying that 2 people from the department have already asked for leave, so if there is nothing to do, gy and lm should not ask for leave.  In a panic, you go to lm and ask her if she planned to attend a friend's wedding before the National Day.  You don't want to miss her important matter because of your leave, but her answer aggravates your grief.  She said she wasn't going because she was going on a business trip.

    How should I understand lz's arrangement?  It was really heart-wrenching. At that moment, I really wanted to leave my job for the first time.  "Drunkard's meaning" is not in wine, is it?  It's not about whether you're going to Gansu, but about having a reason for lm to give up asking for leave and go on a business trip, right?  If this is the case, it is a kind of calculation, but if someone counts you in order to achieve a certain purpose, although this kind of calculation will not cause you any loss, you will still have a very big impact on him  Opinion.  It turns out that no matter what kind of heart you have, you can't tolerate any tossing.

    You asked lz if you can not go, he said that unless the other party said that the registration was late, he had to go.  Later, I asked Gansu, and they said that they are buying tickets now, and they can still sign up.

    lz's behavior this time is really chilling.  While waiting in the SLR repair shop, I saw two little turtles in a small transparent glass fish tank, one with its head retracted into the turtle shell, looking lifeless; the other was climbing up the inner wall of the fish tank, every time it climbed  Sliding down in just one or two steps, this cycle keeps repeating, making people feel suffocated and bored.  Are you thinking, which of these two turtles is more like you?  In one place, you can¡¯t take a step, so the second one looks like you; but the first one looks lifeless to the world, which seems to be the portrayal of you at this moment.  Sometimes I think about it, why did zjy hang himself on a tree?

    Yesterday, I saw a sentence in the "Bhagavad Gita", which said: A person who does not engage in any business can not achieve the goal of inaction; if he simply abandons it, he cannot achieve that success.  There are thousands of reasons in the world, but none of them can get you out of the predicament here.  Sometimes think about it, lz has seen you clearly, so his decision is made for the past and you at this moment, so you will not get any changes here.

    I didn¡¯t think about this issue before, but now I¡¯m suffering because of it because I needed to prepare, learn writing skills, learn the writing modes of different directions of news, I need to read a lot to accumulate materials, and I have to practice my own writing in private  ability, so I was quite busy at that time, but now that I have done all of these, there is not much to do in my spare time, and what needs to be done is to verify the previous theory in practice, and in practice  To weigh the weight of the text, you also need to see what your text looks like, just like a knife in your hand, everything that needs to be sharpened has been polished, the next thing to do is chop it with firewood, look at it  What kind of firewood can be cut, and what kind of firewood should be cut by different knives.  But the fact is, you have been sitting still for too long, and you have been deemed unsuitable for using a knife.

    Next year, I'm really afraid that I can't wait.  But the sense of ritual in your heart makes you have to be patient no matter what, and you don't start until the time to set off.  Speaking of it, there was actually a small reason. At that time, there was also a peaceful reason for resigning - because I wanted to travel, not because I was not satisfied with the work here.  But isn't resignation itself a reason for most dissatisfaction?  Where can parting be free from unhappiness?  It's all just self-deception.

    "I just didn't expect such a result." (Remember the website URL: www.hlnovel.com
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