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hello november

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    ?

    It took me a week to adjust my mentality.

    A chaotic day.

    For seven whole days, I didn't write a word, and I didn't think about any plot of the story.

    I chat with different people.  Talking nonsense.

    Seven days ago, I fell into a deep despair.  Wrote several manuscripts for the composition competition.  But I rejected them all.

    After thinking about it for three days.  I gave up entering the essay contest.

    The torn draft paper was randomly thrown in the trash can.  It's like throwing away the haze hidden in my heart.

    Paint, paint, change, and change, and finally fail to reach the ideal state in the heart.

    Therefore, I am not forcing myself.

    I finished reading Lu Yao's (The Ordinary World).

    But I can't go as I planned.  Rewrite (what didn't happen).

    I wrote another novel.  (wishful thinking).

    I told my niece that I planned to write 600,000 words for this novel.

    Unexpectedly, the niece smiled contemptuously.

    She is only 10 years old.  But children generally don't lie.

    "You are full" she said.

    "Why do you say that?" I was a little annoyed.

    "With this time, why not go shopping or watch TV? Our family doesn't have the material to be a writer"

    "Who told you" I couldn't listen any longer, so I interrupted her rudely.

    "That's what adults say."

    "This is my hobby, hobby, hobby, do you understand?"

    "I don't understand." She flashed innocent eyes.

    "Then what are your hobbies?"

    "Eating, sleeping, eating, sleeping"

    "Live like a pig."

    "But it's better than wasting your time"

    My eyes widened.  She closed her mouth in fear.

    This kid why does he like to hit me so much

    The editor of the website reminded me that no matter the title or idea, don¡¯t be too literary, too literary If you are not famous, no one will read it

    So, on a very ordinary afternoon.

    I began to reflect on my own creative style.

    In this age when there are more authors than readers, how do you stand out?

    When I finished writing (summer blown by the wind), my life seemed to enter another cycle.

    Inexplicably feeling empty, lost, and hopeless.

    Even though, I am working hard to conceive the next novel, and I want to use busyness to pass the loneliness.  But it seems to backfire.

    I have never seriously read this novel from beginning to end.  Maybe it's too hard

    Therefore, when I write the next article, I always feel out of shape.

    The original purpose of writing a novel is to be famous.  I always feel that I am talented and should make good use of it.  Look at what others have written.  It's a bit like watching the sky from a well.  When I actually implement it and enter into the creation, I understand the difficulty.

    The more I write down, the worse I feel.  limited ability.  Know too little knowledge.

    I can't write well, and I'm afraid I won't be able to write.

    As I get older, I become more and more sensitive to the term failure.

    Sometimes, I really want to stop and cry alone in the room.  At the most painful time, I thought of giving up.  But I can't bear it.

    People are really cheap.  Don't cherish things that are too easy to get.  The more difficult it is, the more I want to climb up.

    Probably because of the cold weather.  My heart has also become much harder.

    The noon sun is still warm.  Dazzling, bright.  The wind blows the fallen leaves.  The sweet-scented osmanthus fell and disappeared, as if the end of the year.

    I rode to the supermarket to buy red beans and barley.  The body is in bad condition.  Always stubbornly boil red bean barley porridge to drink.

    It cannot cure all diseases.  Just reassure yourself.

    I don't feel hungry, but I keep eating.  Especially when alone, no matter what I like or don¡¯t like, I always want to keep stuffing it in my mouth keep stuffing it

    I know I'm starting to feel depressed again

    Melancholy Melancholy I hate that word

    Standing on the scale, it weighed a few more catties.  Then tell yourself not to eat anymore

    Even if you can't get a good-looking appearance, you don't want to be fat and out of shape

    The aesthetics of our family regards thinness as beauty.  My brother has always been skinny.  But I was kind of fat at 18.

    Every time I eat, my brother will say to me meaningfully, little girl, can you eat less???  Eat it, no one will marry you

    The elder brother who loves his body so much finally married a wife who was fat.

    He was 24 years old when he got married.

    When he was 17 years old, he liked a Shandong girl.  Together for three years.  The two even took wedding photos.  The first time I saw that girl, there was always a kind of classical beauty.  she is skinny.  It's the type my brother likes.  I remember one Chinese New Year, it snowed heavily.  Regardless of opposition, my brother insisted on running to the girl's house to celebrate the New Year.  Angry parents always say my brother is a white-eyed wolf.

    But always because of the distance.  The girl's parents do not agree with the girl marrying out of town.

    The girl did not compromise.  But the girl's father was stubborn.  Because he only has one daughter, he knelt down in front of the daughter who was about to elope with my brother His kneeling changed the ending of a beautiful love

    But my brother didn't give up.  Because the girl told him that given her time, she would do the work of a parent.

    Mom didn't know that her brother was waiting for her, and always arranged for him to go on a blind date.  Every time he went on a blind date, he told his mother that his legs were too thick without even entering the room

    This one is too short

    This waist is too thick

    This is so ugly

    Maybe it's because I really didn't meet Ruyi.  My parents were so anxious about my brother's marriage that there were ants on the hot pot.  The elder brother waited for her for two years, and during these two years, the girl got married.  She didn't give a good answer as she said.

    My brother stood in the yard and cried for a long time.  That day, he burned all the photos with the girl.

    Become depressed.

    And the girl kept calling him after she got married, telling him to wait She said she was just trying to make her parents happy, she was not living happily, and she would get a divorce

    And he believed it naively After another half a year, the girl didn't get divorced, on the contrary she became pregnant

    He finally understood that all these years of waiting in vain was just a joke made by others

    That year, in October.

    He suddenly told his mother that he wanted to get married.  Mom was both happy and scared.  She didn't know why her son changed his mind about not getting married.

    In October, none of the boys and girls who worked outside the country returned to their hometowns.  Most of the blind dates are arranged during the Spring Festival.

    There is no one to choose.

    Fate is sometimes wonderful.

    A girl went home to visit relatives in October because her father was ill.  Exactly the same age as my brother.  Still single.

    So, with the help of relatives, we went on a blind date.  Mom didn't hold out much hope.

    Because the girl is fat.  What my brother taboos the most is being fat.  But unexpectedly, the elder brother agreed to the marriage the first time he saw her.

    At 24 years old, they got married.

    They have not gone through a painstaking love.  After the blind date, they went their separate ways and went to other places to work.  Seldom meet.

    But they got married anyway.

    I don't know if he loves her or not, I only know that my brother has never changed his number for so many years.  He used that number from the age of 17 to the age of 30

    How many merciless years have passed.

    Many years later, when I look back at the roads I have traveled, my memory is wet with tears

    I remember the bleak figure of my brother standing in the wind, the sky was pitch black, the light of the moon reflected on him, and the lonely fields behind him

    He stubbornly refused to tell us the reason, standing alone in the dark night as a microcosm of loneliness.

    I love my brother, so I feel sorry for the road he walked.  Compared with him, I am very happy.

    What can change us is not the cruel reality.  But more and more mature and indifferent heart.

    It is not others that can hurt us but ourselves.

    When you fall, if there is no one to help you, then stand up by yourself.  Keep smiling even in the most embarrassing poses to those who laugh at us.

    No one can defeat us, only ourselves can defeat us.

    I am not writing novels for fame now.  It completely changed me.  Makes me feel like I'm doing something meaningful.  Enjoy the thought process.  Eyes widen.

    When I let go of the baggage and do it, it becomes a lot easier and more natural.

    I know the blues are only temporary, like a monthly period.  All the dirty things will flow from the body.

    November, come on!  (Remember the site URL: www.hlnovel.com
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